he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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