My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
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