Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
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