I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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