She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Randomize
