so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
