and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
