My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Randomize
