hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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