Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
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