So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
