Multitasking record: pooping whilst putting on shoes and cleaning ear with q-tip. All while texting.
Update: fell off toilet, one shoe on, q-tip still in ear. Not a pro.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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