there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Randomize
