worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Randomize
