does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
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