I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
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