So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
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