One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
meet me or not, i'm out of control
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
