I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize
