another moral hangover. fuck.
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
