just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
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