either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
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