love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize