She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
You almost got us killed.
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