I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
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