Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize