HIV tests are more positive than that guy
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
ttyl tear gas
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
Randomize
