You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize
