I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Randomize
