you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
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