His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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