And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
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