i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
