I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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