Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Randomize