Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Randomize