No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
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