that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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