piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
