im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
