Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
