and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
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