i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Ladies don't puke and tell
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
