pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Randomize
