So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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