I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Randomize
