God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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