well you can't waste a boner
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Randomize
