stop calling my apartment porn island.
My pussy is not your playground.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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