Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
