I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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